Worries About Mourning

I worry I will not be able to cry at my mother’s funeral
Or my father’s for that matter

I worry that as people stop by to give their condolences
They will notice I don’t care much for their words
Luckily sunglasses can help me hide

I worry about the days after
That things will go back to normal too quickly
And that it will offend my deceased parents
Even though they will be dead and unable to be offended

I am worry
That I might be worried about the wrong things
And that when the moment comes I will be unprepared

If only there were instructions
If only I could get out of this
If only I could go first
Then it would be their problem

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